Today we tried to get lost. I think I prefer to be found.
After a night of camping just outside the small town of Nederland, CO—we find ourselves, yet again, with no plans for the day. I think it’s a good idea to ask the campsite host for some recommendations for off-the-path day-hikes nearby.
He’s busy shuffling wood in the back of his pickup truck next to his large RV. The exchange goes as follows:
“Hi there, excuse me!”
No response. I’m about ten yards from his truck.
“Hey, hey, excuse me!”
Still no response. I step to the side, making sure I’m in his eyesight.
“Hi! Excuse me!”
He looks up. Can’t tell if he was just playing dumb the first two times or if he has a hearing problem.
“Hi,” he mumbles.
“I was just wondering if you could give me a recommendation for an off-the-beaten-path day-hike within an hour or two of here.”
“Off-the-beaten-path eh…”
He looks off into the distance.
“Well, all I can think of is Pickle Gulch. Just a few miles from here. Not a lot of folk know about it. You hike up the trail and there’s an old gold mine I think. Never been.”
“That sounds great.”
“Yeah, you head down 119 toward Blackhawk and then you’ll come to Pickle Gulch road. You wanna turn onto it, and then you’ll see two paths. The one that goes up the hill—you don’t want that one.” He smiles. “That one leads to a man who don’t take very kindly to tourists.”
I nervously laugh.
“The other, though, that’s the hiking trail. That’s about all I know for off-the-beaten-path. The rest are full of, well, people.”
He grimaces. I take it he doesn’t take to kindly to tourists either, even though he’s making a living off of them.
“I have to warn you, though,” he continues. “You need to watch out for mountain lions. I have to tell you that.”
“Right.”
“She’s had them up there—the lady who owns the place. I just feel I have to tell people that. Be careful.”
“Okay.” She’s had them up there? What does that mean? Does she just keep them around the property, throwing them food like Betty White in Lake Placid?
“A couple from Wisconsin—I told them about Pickle Gulch and told them about the mountain lions and bears and they were like, ‘mountain lions and bears?’ And I was like, ‘You’re in the Rockies now. They’re around.’ You’re not in cheese country anymore, you know?”
I know. In fact, I’m completely aware of the wildlife situation going down up here in the Rockies. I know to not keep food in the tent so bears don’t come lurking. I know not to be stupid and jump off a cliff. I’d like to think I’m more aware than you’re average tourist. And I know there are mountain lions. But just the way he said it—coupled by the fact that the day before Mike and I overheard a man talking to a woman in the grocery store about a recent mountain lion incident. Or maybe it was how he preferred mountain lions to bears…
“The sheriff the other day—“
They have a sheriff. Wow. We are not in cheese country no more.
“The sheriff went for a jog and he had that feeling that he was being followed, you know?”
No. I’ve never had that feeling.
“And he turns around and he’s being tracked—by a mountain lion.”
Okay, a mountain lion with balls to track a sheriff…
“The sheriff, he didn’t have his weapon on him. So he turns around and just makes himself big and scary, ya know, to scare him off.”
Big and scary. Check. I can do that……………..Not.
“And the mountain lion ran off. Put a scare in the sheriff for sure. Those mountain lions, they’re sneaky—“
(Can’t remember if he said “sneaky” or “creepy.” Both are appropriate I’m sure. Or may it was “creepin,” as in “They be creepin around.”)
“You just got to be careful. I got to tell folks that,” he finishes.
“Well thank you.”
“You have a good a good day now.”
Sure will. Absent of mountain lions.
Oh, and that conversation we overheard in the grocery store? The man was definitely talking about how he prefers mountain lions to bears…wtf?!
-- JEFF
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